The longest training run is OVER!

I am so relieved and proud of myself. I finished my 20 mile run on Saturday. It took me just under 4 hours to do and I didn't push myself too hard during it. I had been dreading, loathing and beside myself with fear and stress just thinking about that long run. Most of my issues with it was because my 18 mile run was so horrible. I figured that since my 18 mile was so hard that this would be near impossible. But it really wasn't. I found myself reading blogs and running articles that all said the same thing. The said, go slow, don't be afraid to walk through water stations and be proud of yourself and the training you have done so far. I took their wisdom to heart and I think it made a lot of difference. I also made sure not to run faster then I normally would run since that is what caused a lot of my grief during the 18 miler. I was even able to use the extra energy that I had at the end of my run to sprint home about half a mile. During the 18 mile run, I don't think I could have given any more at the end. As soon as I walked through the door I stretched and jumped into an icy cold tub. My legs and ankles loved me for this. My feet had not hurt during the run which I still think is amazing in itself since that is the one thing that has been constant for the past two months. I made sure to eat my Cliff Bloks and GU during my run. I also appreciate that a few local running organizations offered cups of Gatorade Endurance around my 6 mile mark, 9 mile mark, 11 mile mark and 14 mile mark. I stopped at two of them to rehydrate but I carry my own of G2 which isn't as heavy on the syrup and sugar. I really do not like Gatorade and found that I really run well and stay hydrated with G2. It isn't made to be used during high activity but I figured that it seems to work well with me and I will stick with it. Especially on race day. I will bring my G2 but I will use the Gatorade that they offer along the route during race day. I am looking forward to the race and that is a big difference from a week ago.

I am sure that many of my family and friends think I am utterly insane for even doing this. I think I am. But heck, how frustrating is it to set a goal (especially at New Years Eve) and never achieve it. I wanted to prove to myself that I can do whatever I set my mind to. Achieving a goal isn't easy and this was by far no where near easy. I am very appreciative of my husband for helping me keep my eyes on my goal. He would watch the kids for me on Saturdays so I could do my long runs. Sure, the majority of the time they were all sleeping but I couldn't leave my kids alone to run sleeping or not. He almost always asked me "how was your run" and seemed to encourage me, even when I uttered, "it sucked". Having two kids, working evenings and a husband that works during the day was difficult to train but I did it. I could NOT have done it without help and a strong will to achieve this dream. Many people have told me that they would never be able to this, but I by no means am a runner. I never loved running. There were many things telling me that I should stop and that I was too busy or that this was too hard to do. But, I have learned to respect the run and the journey. I have learned a lot about myself and what I enjoy about running at this point. I love being able to free my mind and think about life. I think about all the good things in life and reflect on my past. I have found a happy medium between what I have always wanted to be and who I am. I am not sure if many people are able to see where they have been and who they are now. The journey is where you learn about yourself. You learn about your shortcomings and your achievements and how they relate to the bigger picture. So far, this training has shown me that I am still able to set my mind to something and do it. "Blah, Blah..." people may think but really this wasn't about anyone but myself and I am happy with my journey and myself, no matter how difficult it has been.

I wanted to lose weight, however, my weight has not fluctuated much, but you can see a difference in my build since May. I am disappointed slightly that my "number" weight hasn't dropped, but I FEEL better about myself. I still have areas that I wish would minimize or tighten up but all in good time. If I can run and train for a marathon, I can learn to exercise regularly and eat better. After the marathon, I may still run. In fact, I wouldn't mind running a half marathon but I will not do another marathon. I will probably still run about 5 miles a few times a week but I will not go running 10+ for the pure zest of it.

OK, enough of this meaningless drivel for you all to absorb. I do appreciate you following along so far. I am going to focus some of my attention on what my next goal will be. I have thought learning another language or getting back into art. I do miss and love drawing. Heck, maybe I should start smaller and pick ONE book and finish it to the end. That can't be too difficult, could it?